I just had an epiphany. After years of wondering why the hell people with children throw birthday parties for kids who are too young to even realize that they are a sentient being, I now understand that it's more about the parents celebrating the fact that they managed to keep something alive for a year.
With that in mind, today marks six months since I opened the door of this place and I haven't yet fallen into financial decrepitude, so I think I might have a celebratory drink! And eat lots of pizza! Come by if you're in town - there will be $6 specials all night!